In this video we will talk about why people lie to us. We have a tendency to dislike people who lie to us, whether it is our partner, our family or very good friends. The minute somebody tells a lie and we know about it, we get hurt and we do not like facing the person again, we can also go back to get an explanation from them as to why they lied to us.
What we need to look at here is why would we lie to somebody. Just think about it, why would we lie to anybody? why would we lie to our partner? or why would we lie to our parents? The simple answer is that they cannot handle the truth. They are not strong enough emotionally to handle the truth. So we tell them something that they can handle which is a lie.
So the next time somebody lies to you, instead of wasting your time thinking as to why that person has lied to you, instead of getting hurt and creating more enmity between the two of you, creating negative energy between the two of you. You need to sit down and think whether I would accept the truth by being stable or would I create a drama, would I create an uneasy situation, if that person had told me the truth straight away. Am I strong enough or stable enough to accept the truth or hear the truth.
Have I somehow given this person the message that I am not stable enough to handle the truth. Maybe in the past you may have reacted when that person told you the truth or you may have reacted to somebody else’s lie/truth and this person was there experiencing that.
So this person has told you a lie, could be your partner, your partner has told you a lie so that this drama is not created, and you do not go through uneasiness nor does he/she want to go through uneasiness.
So lets make ourselves stable, lets make ourselves strong enough to handle the truth from people, to be able to except peoples mistakes without creating a drama or a negative energy field at that moment.
We can make ourselves stable by practicing self awareness. Self awareness will help us dissolve all kinds of insecurities that we have, all kinds of false attachments that we derive our sense of self from. All of us are unstable at some point of time, because we are not focused on getting our identity from our true self.
Kids lie to teachers because teachers cannot handle the truth. If the kid tells the teacher I just forgot to do my homework, the teacher can never handle the truth. Instead if the kid would lie to the teacher saying I wasn’t well and hence I did not do my homework.. he/she will accept that.
Same with parents, if their kid comes home and tells them that he/she didn’t fare well in the test at school, the first question the parents will ask him why? he/she would say I had prepared but did not fare well, but the others also haven’t fared well, then the parents will not create a drama, now that part that the others also haven’t fared well could basically be a lie… but that will make the parents a little stable “ok the others also did not fare well”. Maybe in the past they created a drama when he/she did not do well in the test. They said we are spending so much on your education etc etc.
So we need to make ourselves stable in our daily living. We need to focus on our true self and dissolve the wrong sense of self which we get through attachments, through insecurities etc.
Another example why your good friend could lie to you is because maybe you somehow have this pattern of getting a little jealous, when your friends are going ahead in certain aspects of their life. So they may lie to you and tell you that it hasn’t worked out for me even though it has worked out for them. They do not want you to feel jealous or they do not want to see you being jealous about them. Here again we are not strong enough to handle peoples success.
So we need to work on ourselves instead of blaming others for our inefficiency or insecurities. I recommend practicing self awareness to overcome this. Click here for a free guide to self awareness.
Image by : blmiers2